Dear people on bnlmusic.com,

No one knows many details of the new tour yet, so stop asking, goddammit! You can be sure that when people in the know, such as fan club members and stalkers, find out, they'll post about it within minutes. Some of them are nasty people, but they'd never keep tour dates secrets because they want to brag about hearing things before others do. I'm not like the first part of the sentence, but yeah, I'll probably end up posting tour dates if no one else has. And if you live in the barenaked belt, especially in Boston or Detroit, you'll know when the tour has been announced because many people will spontaneously combust with joy, and you'll see small explosions everywhere.

Love,
me.

P.S. No, I don't know anything about the tour. And I can't find my Mixfest ticket either. It's somewhere on my computer, I swear.